Book #156: Super Mario Bros. By Todd Strasser

 

Super Mario Bros.

Todd Strasser

 Released: January 1st, 1993

My 22nd book for 2026 was Todd Strasser’s "Super Mario Bros."  

I really like Todd Strasser's work.  He writes simpler books and geared at a younger audience.  My thing is, he's the one that writes books about some of my favorite movies.  The sad part is, these are the only novelized versions (outside fanfiction renditions).  I always think of the Batman novelizations.  They had an adult novel, and a children's novel.  So both could enjoy at their respective pace.  But alas, beggars cannot be choosers.  Otherwise we would also have novelizations of the Wayne's World series, and Airheads.  Shhaahhh, Righttttt!  And monkeys might fly outta my butt!

I remember when this movie came out.  I was so excited by the previews.  Only to be bored to death about 30 minutes in when I finally rented it from Blockbuster.  
Mario Mario and his brother Luigi are NYC plumbers in the Bronx.  One day after taking a job, Mario helps Luigi ask a woman on a date.  When she gets kidnapped and taken into a dinosaur city embedded in Earthly rock, they must follow her into the realm, and save her and others from a deadly fate at the hands of Koopa.  Koopa has a nasty habit of turning people he doesn't like into a sort of ooze from a de-evolution machine.  Fun stuff.

I remember it seemed so bland when I first saw it.  The look of the Koopas and other characters were so weird looking.  I really love what they did with the CGI Mario movie that came out a few years ago.  I was raised on the Super Mario cartoons.  I figured with how entertaining those episodes were, a movie should be a smash hit.  Hell, look at Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Somehow they managed to screw up one of the biggest franchises in video game history.  Now don't get me wrong, it has developed a sort of cult following in recent years as most shunned movies do.  But it did break my heart upon first viewing.

The reading of the novel is pretty good.  I haven't seen the movie in probably 10 years, so I really could not tell you how much it deviated.  When I think about the film, I always think about Luigi falling into the rock, Mario hesitating, and then falling in after him.  But as a standalone, it works.

My first exposure to Mario was at my friends Ryan Ritchie and John Fletcher's houses growing up.  they showed me a new world on their Super Nintendo's, which I explored further when I got my first video game system, a Nintendo 64.

I read this one digitally.  I love the Archive Online.  So many options!

Here is what I learned:
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• For more Super Mario Bros. Movie goodness, visit SMBmovie.com

• To Steven and Kelly Florio, Nintendo experts, and to their parents, with great appreciation.

• The story begins in Brooklyn, 65 million years ago.

• It then jumps to Brooklyn, 20 years ago (1973).

• Koopa is after a girl for a piece of the meteorite.

• A koopa is born in a Brooklyn Catholic Church.

• Mario Mario is named after his father.

• His brother is Luigi Mario.

• The Bella Napoli restaurant has a broken dishwasher.

• Unlike the game, Luigi does not have a mustache like Mario.

• Luigi enjoys the show “Our Miraculous World”.

• The episode he watches is “Man Discovered He’s An Alien.”

• Luigi is the slob of the family.

• Luigi reads tabloids.

• The Mario family has always worked in plumbing and always had mustaches.

• It bothers Mario that Luigi doesn’t have a traditional mustache.

• Scapelli Construction, Plumbing, and Concrete is a rival company.

• Pascal owns Bella Napoli.

• Doug and Mike are slime balls who work for Scapelli.

• Archaeological digs are an uncommon sight in Brooklyn.

• Daisy is an archaeologist.

• Anthony Scapelli is the owner of the business.

• Iggy and Spike stalk Daisy.

• “Look, what my brother is trying to say is that he doesn't know what to say because you've got him all mixed up. Just standing near you makes him feel so full of emotion that he doesn't know where to start. The point is, if you believe in love at first sight, get in the van.”

• Mario is seeing Daniella.

• “Relax, Luigi.  There used to be Dodgers here too.”

• Daisy was abandon as an infant.

• She was brought up at St. Teresa’s on Fulton Street.

• Mario and Luigi are also orphans.

• Mario raised Luigi.

• Iggy and Spike kidnap Daniella.

• Luigi has never worked on a Sump Pump.

• Iggy and Spike knock out the Mario Bros and kidnap Daisy.

• The brothers end up in Dinohattan.

• An old lady mugs Mario and Luigi and steals $33.

• Bertha stops the old lady.

• Toad is a musician.

• Metro Central is the main Dinohattan Police Station.

• Fungus is choking Dinohattan.

• The plumbing business is failing.

• Larry Lizard is the Mario Bros’ lawyer.

• Larry is actually Koopa.

• Koopa is de-evolved to a puddle of primordial ooze.

• Various street names include: Great Koopa Boulevard, Grand Koopa Parkway, Koopahari Desert Tunnel, and Grand Koopa River Parkway.

• Koopa and Lena take mud baths.

• Koopa evolves Iggy and Spike.

• Koopa has a royal pet named Yoshi.

• Mario hates the Knicks.

• Bertha works at the Boom Boom Bar.

• Spike’s is short for Spikeasauralopolus.

• Dinohattan features the Statue of Repression, which is Koopa's droll paean to his neofascist monarchy.

• Koopa the Sensitive ran 4 years ago for office and only got 2%.

• Koopa replaced King Bowser the philosopher as leader of Dinohattan.

• The Dactyl is a popular dance in Dinohattan.

• Bertha develops feelings for Mario.

• Thwomp Stompers are boots for getting rid of Goombas.

• The Mario family has sayings about tools for various situations that have been passed down.

• Daisy is a vegetarian.

• She doesn’t eat anything with a face.

• King Bowser is Princess Daisy’s father.

• Mario was supposed to take Daniella to the Roller Derby.

• Koopa gathers troops in Koopa Square for the Mammal world invasion.

• Scapelli is transformed into a chimpanzee wearing a suit.

• The story ends on a cliffhanger with Daisy arriving to the apartment and asking the brothers to come quick.

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Overall, not a bad little novelization.  If you're not familiar with the Super Mario Bros. franchise, this is probably not one of the better starting points.  Play one of the games first.  It's serviceable, but only diehards or people curious should read.  I feel guilty here because while the book isn't a bad read, I don't want to recommend something if I don't truly feel someone should read and experience it.  Sadly, despite somehow working in a literary sense, I don't see a "YOU MUST READ THIS" feeling about it.  So I must default to not recommend.

Not Recommended.

On to Book #157: Against The World by Kerry Eggers and Dwight Jaynes.

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Need to catch up?  See previous blog post: Adventures In Babysitting.